Fifty Shades of Grey Eggs and Ham

March 18, 2015

 


I am Grey. I am Grey. Grey am I.                              

 

That Christian Grey, that Christian Grey! I do not like that Christian Grey.


Do you like to be spanked?


I do not like that, Christian Grey. I do not like to be spanked.


Would you like that in the Red Room of Pain?


I would not like that in the Red Room of Pain. I would not like that again and again. I do not like to be spanked. I do not like that, Christian Grey.


Would you like it in the buff? Would you like it being cuffed?


I do not like that in the buff. I do not like that being cuffed. I do not like it in the Red Room of Pain. Stop asking me again and again. I do not like being spanked. I do not like that, Christian Grey.


Could I spank you with a whip? Every time you bite your lip?


Not with a whip. Not when I bite my lip. Not in the buff. Not being cuffed. I would not like that in the Red Room of Pain. I would not like that again and again. I do not like being spanked. I do not like that Christian Grey.


Would you? Could you? In the nude? Try it! Try it! Don’t be rude.


I would not, could not, in the nude. Stop looking at me like that.


You may like it. You will see. You may like it over my knee.


Not over your knee. I would not, could not, over your knee. Not in the nude! What’s wrong with you? I do not like it with a whip. I will not stop biting my lip. I do not like it in the buff. I will not like it being cuffed. I do not like your Red Room of Pain. Stop asking me again and again. Stop asking me both night and day. I do not like that, Christian Grey.


The pain! The pain! The pain! The pain! Could you, would you for the pain?


Not for the pain! Not over your knee! Not in the nude! Stop stalking me! I would not, could not, with a whip. Excuse me while I bit my lip. I will not do it being cuffed. I will not do it in the buff. I will never like your Red Room of Pain. I will not be your damned submissive. I do not want that, Christian Grey.


Say, Ana! On a yacht? Here on my yacht! Would you, could you, on my yacht?


Oh, my God, how many times do I have to say this? I would not, could not, on your yacht.


Would you, could you, in an elevator?


I would not, could not, in an elevator. Not on your yacht. Not for the pain. Not in the nude. Not over your knee. I do not like that, Christian, you see. Not in the buff. Not with a whip. Not being cuffed. Excuse me while I bite my lip. I will not in your Red Room of Pain. I have to ask you, are you sane?


Do you not like being spanked?


Read my bitten lip. I do not like that, Christian Grey!


Could you, would you, if I stayed calm?


I would not, could not. You never stay calm.


Could you, would you, ease my twitching palm?


I do not care about your twitching palm. You never, ever, can stay calm. I will not do in it an elevator. I will not mix pain and pleasure. Not on your yacht! Not in the nude! Not over your knee! Stop being rude! I do not like it with a whip. I only like to bite my lip. I will not do in in the buff. I will not do it being cuffed. I do not like your Red Room of Pain. I do not like telling you this again and again! I do not like being whipped. I do not like it, Christian Grey. My Inner Goddess finds your request the oddest.  


You do not like it, so you say. Try it, try it, and you may. Try it and you may, I say.


Christian! If you will leave me alone, I will try it. Just this once...Say! I do like being whipped! I do! I like it, Christian Grey! I just love your twitching palm! I would do it wearing things you’ve bought! And I will do it on your yacht. And for the pain. And in the nude. And over your knee. And that thing with the steel balls. So I will do it with a whip. And I will always bit my lip. And I will do it in the buff. And I will do it being cuffed. And I will do it in the Red Room of Pain. Say! I will do it anywhere, anytime, anyplace. I do so like being whipped! Thank you! Thank you, Christian Grey!


To be continued in “Cat O’ Nine Tails Strikes Back.”

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