Less ego, more real self builds kindness

February 22, 2018

In order to fully experience the present moment, we need to let go of our egocentricity. The human ego is all about image. We are so concerned with our reputation that we lose sight of the beauty that is happening right now in the present moment.


When your ego rules your behavior, it tends to limit your actions. You end up living a constricted existence. Try living your life without conditions. Stop letting your ego put limits on your potential.

Your mind can come up with solutions to any problem if you just set aside self-imposed restrictions. There is no limit to your creativity. Do not listen to the voices of the naysayers who say you are not good enough.

Have faith in yourself and the wisdom of nature. Nature has given you gifts and inborn abilities, so use them. Do not let your ego worry about what bitter people might say. You owe it to yourself to be yourself. Don’t let your ego get in the way of letting nature flow through you.

The price of allowing ego to become a stumbling block is missing out on the joy of the here and now. While we are wondering what other people think, we are overlooking the loveliness of the natural world. When we are focused on self-image, we forget to appreciate our blessings.

It is surprising how often we miss the opportunity to say thank you. Giving compliments to others seems to escape our attention when we are focused on our ego. Let’s face it: We could all do better at putting aside our self-importance and showing gratitude to those around us.

When you do not feel comfortable with yourself, you may start to feel lonely. What is important to realize is that you are never by yourself, because you are always with yourself. Typically, when people are lonely, they engage in superfluous action. They find busywork and try to distract themselves from their lonely feelings. People impulsively want to hide from solitude.

Once you understand that we are never alone, there is no longer a reason to be so afraid of solitude. Spending time with yourself can be a beautiful and rewarding experience. There is no one else there to tell you who you should be. You can drop all those social labels and expectations that others try to place on us.

In solitude, your race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, weight, income, reputation, and social status do not matter. You are free from being judged and scrutinized by others. The only expectations you need to live up to are your own. The only person to judge you is you. The question then becomes: How well do you accept yourself?

Forget about perfection. Nobody is perfect. To expect perfection is to set yourself up for disappointment. Are you a perfectionist? If so, your perfectionism is making you miserable. You’re always falling short of perfection, so you are always frustrated and sad. Let go of this self-defeating concept and accept your flaws.

Once you realize perfection is an unrealistic goal, you can honestly look at yourself in a non-judgmental way and drop all preconceived notions of who you should be. This process of self-acceptance is a lot easier to do when you have a sense of humor. Don’t take yourself so seriously.

Show yourself some compassion. It is amazing the transformation you will experience when you embrace your humanity. When you learn to love yourself, you will no longer fear being alone.

Today's Loving Suggestion: Spend some time in solitude. Find a quiet place where you can be with yourself, even if that means locking yourself in the bathroom. Enjoy the freedom of getting away from all those people who are trying to make you into the person they want you to be. Drop the titles, labels, roles, and notions of perfection. Just be you. Accept yourself the way you are with compassion. And while you are at it, why not smile?

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